Moaning Minnies disappointed by opening of Cambridgeshire Busway

Hey, where's the hell's the guideway, I lost it at Milton?

Opponents of the Cambridgeshire Busway aka 'The Misguided Bus' have apparently been pouring into their local hostelries to drown their sorrows following the announcement that the busway will finally open.

Their long indulgence in schadenfreude looks to be at an end now that the service is due to open.

So what will they do now?

Well maybe. Recently, Matthew Shuter, County Council cabinet member for enterprise, said: “Buses are not necessarily the best way to get people around, and they are not the way forward for us.”

What, not the way forward? This is just over two weeks before it opens its £116 £180 million gilded busway!

We know that they've just decided to cut bus subsidies, so perhaps buses are an embarassment to them now, and err well there is their gigantic overspend on the Gilded Bus to 'sort out'.

Apparently politicians are well versed in using reverse gear and the U turn. Neither manoeuvre is of course possible on the said guideway, in more ways than one.

Tim Phillips of CAST.IRON was unavailable for comment.

C.N.

Cantrill's Mega Mushrooms

Cantrill's Mega Mushrooms on Jesus Green

Ambitious councillor Rod Cantrill who took over the Parks and Open Spaces responsibility from fellow councillor Julie Smith, has been keen to build his green credentials.

Firstly he made sure he took full credit for the planting of trees on Midsummer Common and Jesus Green, although most of the preparatory work was done under his predecessor.

While hoping that the thorny issue of the Alexandra Gardens trees will quietly subside, he has been seeking to cement his green credentials.

He has recently introduced these mushroom shaped BBQ tables on Jesus Green. Unfortunately it looks like there may have been confusion by the hapless Council between metric and imperial units when they were ordered, the pictures of the new mushrooms, show some over 2m tall.

The decorative look did not exactly meet with universal public approval either. Residents groups claimed that they were not properly consulted over the colour scheme, prompting the Trees and Open spaces department to launch an immediate online public consultation. The Cambridge Nuisance has been told that the results are expected shortly.

Local blogger Richard Taylor has heavily criticised the Councils procedures. He Tweeted "Cantrill's massive mushrooms are another disaster cooked up for Jesus Green - he must explain what's gone wrong with the recipe"

Cllr Rod Cantrill was unavailable for comment.

C.N.

Tweet

Lady Shona repents busway 'failure to meet promises'

Lady Shona

"I remember saying how good it would be" she said, rather wistfully "but looking at the timetable, it really isn't what we said it would be".

"I rather regret now being such a strident supporter of the system" she added.

Tim Philips, Chairman of the pro-rail group CAST.IRON laughed at length and said "well I told you so".

The Cambridge Nuisance has been given some figures of journey times from Cambridge to Huntindon over time. They aren't encouraging reading.

Fastest bus of the day (from 8th Aug 2011) between Huntingdon and Cambridge doesn't use the Guided Busway at all [6.30am Whippet in 61 mins Bus Station to Bus Station]

Historical comparisons:

1800   150mins by horse (1)

1849    55mins by rail (2)

1869    38mins by rail

1944    39mins by rail (3)

1959    36mins by rail

2002    55mins by bus (4)

2011    71mins by Guided Bus (5)

Notes.
1. This involves some pretty heroic assumptions about the horses.
2. Railway Station was then located across the river in Godmanchester
3. Emergency wartime timetable
4. By Hunts & District (later Stagecoach), the main operator
5. From Hunts railway station to Cambridge Drummer Street

Figures thanks to Brynley

Tim Phillips of CAST.IRON was unavailable for comment

Ecclesiastical insights on the Cambridgeshire Busway

The Reverend Fairlie Shallow-Trough has agreed to answer your six most frequent questions about Cambridgeshire Guided Busway




 J. Archer from Trumpington asks

Is the busway evil?

Rev. Fairlie: No. That's the Luton Busway.

R. Giggs from Cheshire asks

Is the Guideway sinful?

Rev Fairlie: Young people with troubling thoughts about the guided sections are all too common a facet of Cambridgeshire life, but, if used wisely, the busway can stretch your imagination. Dwelling unduly on the Guideway, however, may lead to premature greyness and you might wish to adjust the water temperature downwards when showering.

C Richard from Weybridge asks

Can the Cambridgeshire Guided Busway be saved?

Rev Fairlie: Our Lord performed a number of miracles, but it is unrealistic to expect too much.

R. Dawkins from Swavesey asks

How will I know which ticket to buy?

Rev Fairlie: Richard, the answer is in Hebrews 6.15 "And so, as the result of patient waiting, our forfathers obtained what God had promised". I thought you knew that.

C Lucas from Brighton asks

Is it ethical to use the Whippet on-guideway?

Rev Fairlie: Used in moderation, and provided there is no need to strive, I have no doubt that the northern section of the Cambridgeshire Guided Busway is compatible with the Christian life.

B Menzies from Cambridgeshire asks

Who is to blame for this fiasco?

Rev Fairlie: Bob, thank you for sharing this concern with us. Would you like to reflect on 1 Corinthians 13: 4 - 8a "Love is patient ...it keeps no record of wrongs".

With thanks to Brynley

Does it keep a record of cost? Esp. in the light of the £160m CCC cuts?

Rev Fairlie: Let us prey (on the budget of the Learning Disability Partnership).

With thanks to Socrates

Tim Phillips of CAST.IRON was unavailable for comment

C.N.

The Cambridge Busway is not the only victim of prejudice, says council leader

Councillor Nick Clarke

The Cambridgeshire Busway is not the only project in Cambridgeshire to suffer from prejudice, according to the leader of the county council.

Cllr Nick Clarke said he shared the concerns expressed by 'Bunker' Bob Menzies, headmaster of The Cambridgeshire Busway Project, who launched a staunch defence of his troubled works in a News blog.

Mr Menzies said "appalling bigotry" and "despicable prejudice" towards The Cambridgeshire Busway had a "dramatic effect on the self-confidence and self-esteem of many of the team we work with and must not be tolerated".

Cllr Clarke said The Cambridgeshire Busway was not the only project that suffers in this way.

He told the News: "There is no doubt that prejudice does exist - not only towards The Cambridgeshire Busway, but towards other parts of Cambridgeshire's Council's empire as well."

"The city of Cambridge and its residents suffer similarly from this misconception."

He added: "I have travelled widely throughout Cambridgeshire since becoming leader in May and have seen many examples of these communities working together to raise aspirations for themselves and their families."

"This is where the residents of this county are at their finest – rising to the challenge and refusing to be downhearted by some of the negative perceptions they hear about their council."

"For every project of Cambridgeshire Council we should be proud of what they have achieved and what they stand for."

Tim Phillips of CAST.IRON was not available for comment.